Update

At the end of July my wife discovers my doctor’s note for medical marijuana.  My dumbass left it in the car and she happened to find it.  She asks why I have it and, “more importantly where’s the doctor so I can get him fired”.  I explain to her that I’m tired of trying to call random people to connect in random places.  I’m too old for that.  But I assured her that it was expiring.

Then I renewed it in August.

In October, 2 weeks before the baby was born, she finds my stash and leaves it on the dining room table.  When I get home she tells me there’s something on the table for me.  I walk by and my face is stuck in the “Oh shit” mode.  She starts crying and confronts me on lying to her (she found my bubbler and I told her I was holding it for a friend);  then proceeds to let me know that the baby will not grow up in such a household and that she has no problem taking her and leaving.